Saturday, August 13, 2005

Shattered by the final frame

I took the time to sit on those benches of Italy. I was not sure, whether it was a good idea, but nothing could have detered me. I used the research I had done, the stories I had been told and the various official reports to let the events unfold in my mind's eye and project them to the scene ahead. I imagined his face and his thoughts unfolding. I created my own private reel of film, frame by bloody frame. I needed to try to understand and I needed to be able to go home with news. I travelled to Italy for clarification, searching the streets for the truth. A truth that deep in my heart, I knew could never really be found there, or anywhere else for that matter.

From time to time in life, circumstances proffer devoid of definition, where we are banned from knowing the events as they transpired, consequently banished to plant the root of our fantasy haphazardly, over and over. We may conceive untold excellent reasons that conform to either our bias or worst fears depending on current states of mind, but in the end the only one that does anyone any good, is the one that grants respite. Italy offered to me one such truth that I brought home and delivered, and even if it was conjured, no-one knows it but I. Easier smiles all around give this truth the only validation it honestly needs.

7 comments:

Trée said...

There is what "is" and then there is the thought that we place on top of the "is. Never twain shall they be, never the twain shall they be one.

To bastardize a beatles song, in the end the happiness you make is the happiness you take.

Been a long drive home today, so if none of the above makes any sense, please forgive me ;)

saby said...

Autumn,
honestly i read dis 3 times very slowly, yet

i havent a clue wat u talking about
i tot i shud let u no

Irene said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Jack said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Trée said...

Looks like the bots are out in force tonight--wonder if it was your post that attracted them--lol. ;)

Autumn Storm said...

Trée, no need, makes perfect sense - from where I am standing after it has been filtered through my mind and moulded by personal convictions and ideas ;-)lol.
"the happiness you make is the happiness you take"
-yep!

Saby, thanks for letting me know - This is not the first time, I have had a man tell me, he has no clue as to what I am rambling on about...guess, I need to figure out what to do about that ;-)
PS No need to be troubled to seek the comfort of the ocean, but thanks anyway.

Justin Thyme said...

Autumn - as always, a very poetic and eloquent view into the beautiful soul that is you. You write from your heart and your soul, and although it may be lost to some, there are those for whom your words will resonate deeply.